Satan's Sista....

One Sunday morning, Satan appeared before a small town congregation. Everyone started screaming and running for the front church door, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away.
Soon, everyone was gone, except for an elderly gentleman who sat calmly. Satan walked up to the man and said, "Don't you know who I am?"
The man replied, "Yep, sure do."
Satan asked, "Aren't you going to run?"
"Nope, sure ain't," said the man.
Perturbed, Satan asked, "Why aren't you afraid of me?"
The man calmly replied, "Been married to your sister for over 48 years."

Happily Ever After

A couple celebrated their 25th Marriage Anniversary. They were famous for not having fought in 25 years.
Guests: Sir, its amazing. How did you make it possible?
Husband: We had been to Texas for honeymoon. We did horse riding.
My wife’s horse was a crazy one. On the way that horse jumped suddenly, making my wife topple over.
She patted the horse’s back & said “This is ur 1st time”
After a while it happend again.
She said “this is ur 2nd time” & continued.
When the horse dropped her 3rd time, she silently took out a revolver & shot the horse dead!
I shouted: what did u do, you psycho! U killed the poor animal. R u crazy?
She gave me a silent look and said “This is YOUR first time!”
Husband to guestg: “Thats it.. since then we are Happy Ever After…”