Wednesday, March 20, 2013
Wednesday, March 13, 2013
A-cute-appendicitis.... :D
A blonde has sharp pains in her side. The doctor examines her and says, "You have acute appendicitis."
The blonde says, "That's sweet, doc, but I came here to get medical help."
The blonde says, "That's sweet, doc, but I came here to get medical help."
Satan's Sista....
One Sunday morning, Satan appeared before a small town congregation. Everyone started screaming and running for the front church door, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away.
Soon, everyone was gone, except for an elderly gentleman who sat calmly. Satan walked up to the man and said, "Don't you know who I am?"
The man replied, "Yep, sure do."
Satan asked, "Aren't you going to run?"
"Nope, sure ain't," said the man.
Perturbed, Satan asked, "Why aren't you afraid of me?"
The man calmly replied, "Been married to your sister for over 48 years."
Soon, everyone was gone, except for an elderly gentleman who sat calmly. Satan walked up to the man and said, "Don't you know who I am?"
The man replied, "Yep, sure do."
Satan asked, "Aren't you going to run?"
"Nope, sure ain't," said the man.
Perturbed, Satan asked, "Why aren't you afraid of me?"
The man calmly replied, "Been married to your sister for over 48 years."
PoooooP...
Two flies sit on a pile of poop. One fly passes gas.
The other fly looks at him and says, "Hey do you mind? I'm eating here."
The other fly looks at him and says, "Hey do you mind? I'm eating here."
Sunday, February 3, 2013
If I Were A Millionaire...
"Take a pencil and paper," the teacher said, "and write an essay with the title 'If I Were a Millionaire' "
Everyone but Little Johnny, who leaned back with arms folded, began to write furiously.
"What's the matter," the teacher asked. "Why don't you begin?"
"I'm waiting for my secretary," he replied
Everyone but Little Johnny, who leaned back with arms folded, began to write furiously.
"What's the matter," the teacher asked. "Why don't you begin?"
"I'm waiting for my secretary," he replied
Blondie Taking An Exam
A blonde reported for her university final examination that consists of "yes/no" type questions.
She takes her seat in the examination hall, stares at the questions for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes her purse out, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin and marking the answer sheet, "Yes" for Heads and "No" for Tails. Within half-an-hour she is all done where as the rest of the class is sweating it out.
During the last few minutes, she is seen desperately throwing the coin, muttering and sweating.
The moderator, alarmed, approaches her and says, "What is going on?"
"I finished the exam in half-an-hour. But I'm rechecking my answers."
She takes her seat in the examination hall, stares at the questions for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes her purse out, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin and marking the answer sheet, "Yes" for Heads and "No" for Tails. Within half-an-hour she is all done where as the rest of the class is sweating it out.
During the last few minutes, she is seen desperately throwing the coin, muttering and sweating.
The moderator, alarmed, approaches her and says, "What is going on?"
"I finished the exam in half-an-hour. But I'm rechecking my answers."
Absence...
Father: Why did you get such a low score in that exam?
Son: Absence!
Father: You were absent on the day of the exam?
Son: No but the boy who sits next to me was!
Son: Absence!
Father: You were absent on the day of the exam?
Son: No but the boy who sits next to me was!
Monday, January 14, 2013
Questions :P
"What is the colour of a mirror?"
"If you enjoy wasting time, is that time really wasted?"
"If anything is possible, is it possible for anything to be impossible?"
"If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?"
"If you try to fail and succeed, then which have you done?
"If you enjoy wasting time, is that time really wasted?"
"If anything is possible, is it possible for anything to be impossible?"
"If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?"
"If you try to fail and succeed, then which have you done?
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